The 2016 Tour of Sufferlandria

This is my race number for the 2016 Tour of Sufferlandria.

The 2016 Tour of Sufferlandria begins on February 6th. There are nine stages with one stage per day:

ISLAGIATT (2 hours)
Revolver + Revolver (1 hour 30 minutes)
The Best Thing In The World (48 minutes)
To Get To The Other Side (1 hour 30 minutes)
The Wretched (48 minutes)
The Rookie (55 minutes)
Do As You”™re Told (47 minutes)
A Very Dark Place + Nine Hammers Power Station + Violator (1 hour 46 minutes)

This will be a very challenging nine days of riding however a malcontent believes that the entire Tour of Sufferlandria is a scam:

Frankly, he comes across as a bit of a whining Couchlandrian. Someone hand him a donut.

Can he suffer through this tour? I am doubtful.

I know I will.

Legs speak louder than words.