Ringing and Plugged

As someone who suffers with tinnitus, I have learned how to retrain myself to ignore the ringing sound in my head. When tinnitus first emerged several years ago, I initially lost hope. Passionate about music and sound, the emergence of tinnitus overwhelmed my critical listening skills and plunged me into a very dark place.

I recovered from that initial event although it took several months to adapt to this new reality. Now, for most of the time, I am not aware of the tinnitus.

It did emerge again with a vengeance about two years ago. Not sure why. It proved to be almost as discouraging as the first time it emerged. Fortunately, I quickly adapted after only a week or so.

I came down with a bad virus over the Easter week-end. The virus left me with a little gift: an ear infection. This past Sunday I was very uncomfortable. Feverish and discomfort in my right ear. That discomfort resulted in a complete hearing loss on the right side. Typical of an ear infection, the right side would plug up at night and then would clear sometime during the day.

Unfortunately it brings along with it the dreaded T-monster. The cursed ringing sound. When the ear plugs, there is no externally perceived auditory stimulation. The ringing sound dramatically increases. I’ve not been able to sleep well and I have been dragging myself through the day-to-day activities of life.

The infection is slowly clearing up. The ear stayed open until about 3am today so I was able to get about 4 hours of sleep. I have been up since then. The ear cleared around 5:30am. The tinnitus though is proving to be a bit more resilient.

Incredibly drained and exhausted. I hate tinnitus.